My Memories Today

Memories are funny things. They fade, they change and as you gain perspective of the world they can deepen all of a sudden. What may have not made sense to me as a child, I can now appreciate with new eyes.

How to describe my dad? Soft hearted, hard headed, goofy, child like, loved being a dad, loved to play games and wrestle, loved to build things with his own hands, loved learning, loved history, loved me.

Some of his favorite music was Johnny Cash (we sang
DO LORD constantly when we were in the car) He also loved the Carpenters, John Denver, Carol King, Bill Haley and the Comets. He loved to dance to Bill Haley and the comets. He had a funny dance he would do. It looked like he was rolling dice in both hands while kicking a soccer ball with each foot simultaneously.

He always greeted people by saying,
"Howdy!" But I think that is because he loved John Wayne.

He was tall with a deep voice that could scare you when he yelled. But I was very rarely scared of my dad. I knew he would never really hurt me. Even when he spanked me he always said he was "Sorry I had to do that. It hurt my hand more than it hurt you." I always appreciated that because we deserved spanking often.

He was very smart. He seemed to know EVERYTHING. Anytime I had a school assignment and he was able to help, I would get a lesson on how to do it a way the teacher is not telling us about. This was primarily in Math as he seemed to love it.

My dad loved his church. We belonged to a small, Baptist church on Oak St. in
Plattsburgh, NY. I loved that church too. I was baptized there and we memorialized my dad there.

He was a liberal even though he was a lifetime, military man. He didn't like the Vietnam War, but he fought in it. My stepmother told me last night that he was sending "real death counts" to his congressman while he was over there. That was news to me.

I don't talk about my dad very often because even now as I write this tears are rolling down my face. It has been 24 years since his death and it can come up that quickly. Grief is something you never get over you just learn to live with it.

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